sweethymns | Mι∂ηιgнт Ɠяιη∂

[ Internal groan...except no, this is a bit of a question he's had, so he might as well try to fish for some answers while he can. ]

About the door, then. I understand that ostensibly unremarkable people like myself are rarely given the opportunity to find it.

[ Self-deprecating and patronizing at the same time, he's still got that technique down pat. ]

But. If the door were so inclined to appear even when I wasn't looking for it or strictly needed a cup of coffee, would one consider that to be a malfunction on the part of this 'magic', or is it a part of Miss Iona's wishful thinking that makes her insist that I retain regular status?

[ the most roundabout way to ask: "please tell me that the fact that I keep coming here is purely accidental or because Iona is rude". ]

So nothing special about you at all?

[Monts looks mildly surprised and even more so with his inquiry. She taps her cheek, thinking.]

To be frank, I'm not the best person to ask. The door doesn't really malfunction. It's just there. Iona says she doesn't do anything special to it besides decorate the interior to her heart's content.

[A shrug and Monts stretches out her arms in front of her.]

You're making it sound like you have terrible luck.

I see.

[ Curious. It bothers Claude somewhat that the guidelines to how this place works are missing, because it's ludicrous that there aren't any— he subscribes to the rules of pragnanz, that the world runs in a familiar, cognitive order that allows humans to compartmentalize what they see as rules of nature. Resilient, immovable. Impartial.

His smile falters for a moment, and a flicker of annoyance creeps into his expression before he rights it again. ]

And don't I? [ have terrible luck, he means. ] It's too often that I feel like a charity case.

[Her reply is light and airy, but the weight is there when she says in a matter of fact tone:]

Then you didn't have to come in did you? And if she wanted you to come back, she can't make you.

[Is the door there because people want it to be? More often than not, it graces its presence for those who are already inclined towards abnormality and yet there are exceptions.]

What's the problem? You come inside and you get some of the best coffee this side of the multiverse. I'd say it's a win in this case, not charity.

[ Don't you use his tactics against him, missy... two can play at the game of being nonchalantly weighty, though Claude's patience is worn thin from a full week of dealing with inept, dim-witted people (in his professional opinion).

Being told that he can choose not to be here is grating. Of course he knows that— he hasn't an excuse for being here aside from sentimentalism, and that's more than unacceptable to him on very many levels.

Despite that thought, he keeps his polite smile relatively placid. ]

She's taken my brother's heart hostage. I've no choice in the matter at all. [ Using Gus as an excuse is also a cause for sharp self-loathing, and he almost retracts that the moment it leaves his mouth; he elects not to. ] I suppose I'm here on the benefit of the good graces he's made— but, ah. I'll try not to bore you with those trifles, hm? How rude of me, to keep talking while a lady is present.

[ A deceptively debonair comment. Acting, of course. ]

Edited 2016-05-16 06:33 (UTC)

[It's hard to tell with Monts (it always is), but there is a minor irateness that's been developing the more she talks with Claude. At first she couldn't put her finger on it, but when he evades again and smiles she catches on; they're both actors.

Well, they do say there are people who dislike those who are similar to them.

A brother though? Oh, yes Monts can connect the dots quickly enough.]

Oh, him? The tall one with blue eyes? [He was cute, but hopeless. Monts found him likable though.]

Definitely wouldn't be the first...

Yes, that would be him.

[ He's surprised she made the connection, given that Gus is a sharp 180 with respect to looks and demeanor from angular, crisp Claude. His brother is all soft curves and gentle arcs, the only creases in him from the rumples he makes in his expensive attire; maybe that's it, maybe it's the circumstances of their wealth that make them obviously connected.

Claude is cynical about that.

A short ghost of a laugh, and he raises a brow. ]

But— ah, I'd like to hear more about the others if this seems to be a prevailing pattern.

Edited 2016-05-17 01:12 (UTC)

Is that because you want to have some ammunition against Jackie?

[she asks knowingly because yes, one does need to keep themselves armed against a ball of energy that is the cafe owner]

Oh? You make me sound so sinister.

[ Claude, please look at yourself ]

Do you think I'd need the extra help?

[Oh, boy does he. But Monts actually keeps that to herself.]

In my personal opinion, one is never without need of some help. And one way or another, she's going to pull the rug under you.

[A beat.]

Constantly. Especially when she wants to help.

[Remember the skirt ripping]

Edited 2016-05-17 01:34 (UTC)

[ He's actively trying to forget the skirt ripping ]

Well, I'll have to do my best to stay on my toes. Though I'm no warlock, unfortunately.

[ Just a doctor with a bad attitude. ]

My ammunition, then. [ 'Give me the deets', essentially. After a beat, he appends with breezy charm: ] Please.

[Oh, dear he asked nicely. Monts has honor you see so she crosses her arms and tilts her head, thinking about where to begin.]

... Well, even after she and Dom were over, he's still sweet...

Oh, nonononono.

[TWO HANDS ON EITHER SIDE OF MONTS HEAD although Monts is barely perturbed by Iona giving her cease and desist. Claude's order is set to the side, but this needs her focus.]

I don't wanna cut your pay over trying to disclose my personal matters, hon.

[Iona's pouting, she's definitely pouting as she glances at Claude from behind her friend.]

And I made your coffee this time! Feel a little bad here!?

It's hardly personal if it's a matter of public record, is it?

[ Claude jumps right in on this with the most faux-innocent upturn of his lips he can manage, who is he trying to fool...

There it is, though. That pout. Maybe he missed that expression— it's been a while since he's personally triumphed over her this way. ]

As for feelings of guilt, I do believe that this is a coffeehouse, and you're obliged to serve your paying customers.

[ could he be any more of a bougie rich kid, jeez ]

I'm not obliged to serve you information about certain personal matters. Do you see that on the menu??

[She indignantly gestures wildly at said chalkboard menus... That aren't all that full. It's the charm of the Grind. Due to Oren being able to make almost anything as long as ingredients are readily available in their storehouse, Iona has yet to solidify a true menu.

HER POINT IS MADE HOWEVER]

Or you could just ask me directly. [Nods as if that's the correct answer to this minor mess.]

Edited 2016-05-18 05:38 (UTC)

[ And, without missing a beat, he looks from Iona to Monts with an ease that speaks to his feigned dispassion. ]

I was trying [ he says, with an air of infinite patience ] to strike up a conversation with your friend. 'Bond', if you will.

You just happened to be the topic of conversation.

Bonding? Perish the thought.

[wow monts]

... Yeah, that would be scary. I don't think my heart could take that.

[Monts gives a sigh and both the girls looking at each other and give each other a nod as if agreeing on this simultaneously.]

[ WOW, THIS SHADE

He blinks, then puts one elbow on the table (poor manners, really) to lean into it with his chin, idly taking a sip of his coffee. ]

I'll just finish this and be out of your hair, then.

[ BYE ]

[Unfortunately for Claude, Iona likes him. So she waves her hands in front of herself to try and dissuade him.]

Nonononono! You just got here! You need to rest up don't you?? You got a few hours to kill and to relax with right??

A few hours.

[ The implication here is "what the hell would we do for a few hours, as if spending an extended amount of time with someone is a completely ludicrous concept. ]

I suppose I have one or two. Did you want a checkup?

[ claude why ]

[Monts has wandered off in order to take care of some customers who need a refill or have left the Grind, so some table cleaning will keep her busy (and allow Iona to suffer with the Frenchman)

Iona blinks at Claude's offer. She stands up straight and there's a look of bewilderment that settles across her features, her thick brows furrowing together as if troubled.]

... Hm. HMMMMMMM.

[One can see the gears grinding in her head.]

... Interesting point you brought up....

[ He had every intention of dismissing this as a morbid joke, but Iona actually seems to be considering this... rest in peace.

Setting his cup of coffee down, he leans forward. ]

Oh? Even witches catch the common cold, do they?

[He's trying to be rude and off putting, but Iona breaks her thinking pose to tell him with widened eyes and a voice full of awe...]

I don't remember the last time I went to a doctor.

[LITERALLY HER FACE RN]

[ yikes.jpg ]

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